Every soul deserves a prayer

Tonight I just got news from my aunt that a co-worker at her hair salon died of a car crash. It was on her way out of Giant Pharmacy picking up her medicine after leaving work. It's a little ironic: she picks up medicine that will essentially help her live longer by fighting sickness or improving her health, but before she can even go home to properly ingest it, her life has ended in a second.

One time I said to my uncle that I typically don't like to find any kind of death a funny matter unless it's an ironic death. I take it back. Every death is a solemn matter, and every soul deserves a prayer.
I spend a lot of my life planning for the future and deciding what to do with my life 20 years down the road, but it takes another person's death to remind me that nothing about my future, not even my future itself, is guaranteed. I optimize my chances of living a long life every day by taking care of my diet and practicing safety measures when I'm out in public, but in the end, anything can happen.

When I stop to think about it, I don't fear death. I'm only afraid of my life ending on bad terms. I hope her life ended at the fine time.

Busking experience

On Saturday my string quartet played outside our local Giant for donations for the orchestra. It was cold and windy as expected, but my fingers weren't prepared, so for four hours straight it was really rough. We played Winter holiday tunes and Handel's Passacaglia in G minor out of the blue, which I guess is still appropriate because Baroque and minor keys add ups to winter themes.

The passacaglia was the last song in the cycle to play though, and we played three cycles. By the end of the first song, which was really long because of the tempo and the half notes, the cellist was ready to cut the passacaglia. I wanted to sympathize, but I couldn't at the time, so I pouted and told him sternly that nothing would be cut. Of course, after our last cycle I decided to have us check out thirty minutes early and get our hands warm and functioning again.

The sweetest memory I have from that day is when on our last cycle, just as we were getting to play Handel's Passacaglia for the last time, a man walked toward the box to donate and told us he'd stay to watch us play one song. No one decided to stay and watch because no one before him actively showed any interest. Once he stayed, though, a couple of others gathered to watch, and it was so heart-warming especially since it was our last song of the day and it became our best performance. We finished and he applauded, threw in another dollar, and left.

Regardless of having to put up with playing in the wind for generally unspirited and uninspired people in the community, being there with my team and being rewarded with that one generous man at the end made my time there worth while. I'm excited to do this again.



Happy Thanksgiving,
Annie.

Can't be hateful, gotta be grateful

I already know I won't have the time or energy after Thanksgiving to be able to blog, so I thought I might as well share my thanks and reflect on this past year now. (My thanks extend to Ark Music Factory for another ridiculous music video just in time for the holidays.)

Ark Music Factory's "Thanksgiving Song"

First off, I'm still changing as I grow older, but I think I went through a very rapid transformation this past year since last year's Thanksgiving, and there are a handful of people and events to which I am extremely grateful for. I'd probably still be a lost sheep by now if it wasn't for everything that has happened thus far.

I hope this doesn't come off as dark as I think it will be, but I'm thankful for my very last break up with my then-boyfriend about 18 months ago. It wasn't a healthy relationship at all and because I wasn't the one who would break off, getting kicked out of the relationship pushed me to look at myself honestly in the mirror to accept that I need to be happy and strong on my own before seeking companionship. I remember it being a bit of a painful process, too, as the break-up was about a week before my Confirmation.

Around this time one year ago I joined a new youth group and we started praying through Thao Luyện Nhẹ Nhàng, or "Lightworks". Most people in the group were my age but we all came from different schools and I didn't know anyone very well, but as the program was progressing I gradually loved everyone and was able to relate to them on a spiritual level. We were all kind of lost sheep to varying degrees, and being able to pray for each other helped me to understand a lot more what it meant to be Christian. Lightworks finished after 14 weeks and by then I knew a little more solidly 1) What God's love was all about from Anno Domini, and 2) How to live.

These days I wonder what the kind of person I'd end up being in some parallel universe where I didn't have married, loving parents and God in my life. I think I'd have this never-ending craving to fit in with popular people in school and many of my friends would probably be the people I can't deal with in school right now. Or, surprise surprise, what if I was an incredibly good-looking boy that all the girls wanted me?!

Kurosawa (left) and Nakanishi (right) from Sukitte Ii Na Yo

Hypotheses never end for me no matter how grateful I am about my life...
Whatever I dream up, though, it never compares to the life I live today, because I'm sure I'm on the right path to being the kind of person I want to be.
I want to be the kind of friend who helps to make her own friends better people;
the kind of daughter whose mom can happily trust completely and support endlessly,
the kind of musician who performs with honesty and inspiring musicality,
the kind of teacher who has more to teach about the future and reality than her own actual subject,
the kind of girlfriend who can light a fire in her boyfriend's heart and inspire him to share a love with her beyond romance,
and the kind of blogger who can limit the sappy, poetic endings to only the most special blog posts.
(I try not to do this, sorry.)

Happy Thanksgiving, God bless.

Fostering a viola

Until May I am "borrowing" my cousin's viola. I really don't want to return it because the tone of the viola is darker and so much more rich and I love that sound!
I will be using this lovely viola for my IB HL Music recital in March and maybe I'll play in my school's orchestra with it if I can catch up on reading alto clef! Though I am more competent in violin, I feel the challenge of playing viola in orchestra will be tons more exciting than Carmen Fantasy on violin. I'm so excited right now!

I am naming him (viola) Pablo as in Pablo de Sarasate. It was the first name I thought of and I did want to change my mind to name him Karol for either Former Pope John Paul II (Karol Wojtyła) or Karol Szymanowski but then I'd have a hard time deciding which reference to tell people, so I stuck to Pablo. I love Sarasate's music, anyway, so there's no regrets!

After about thirty minutes practicing Vocalise on viola without a shoulder rest really hurts, though, so I can't play as much as I want until I buy one. Going back to violin even after just thirty minutes on viola feels like this, though:

Things I never learn

I've been really happy with what the Missha Signature Real Complete BB Cream has done for my face these past six days I've been using it! I feel fresh and confident when I walk out the door no matter how many pimples I have! (And that is a problem as well....................................)

Make up has liberated me from caring about my diet and because Dad bought Cheesecake Factory Cheesecake that Saturday that Mom bought me the BB Cream, and also because my violin student gave me an entire chocolate log cake the day after, I haven't found any reason to take care of myself! Mixed with the fact that the more I eat, the less water I drink, my skin has been paying the price, and I am dependent on BB cream each day these past six days. (Cheesecake is my kryptonite... it makes me forget the most important lessons on health and beauty.)

In order to combat this, I have now limited myself to one slice of either cake and only one Keebler cookie (ACK My grandmom gave me Sandies the Sunday I received my student's chocolate log cake! Shortbread cookies also make me weak ///crying///) per day. I must also drink at the very least three 48 fl. oz. of water and two cups of green tea on those days I decide to indulge. It's still not healthy to have a slice of cake every day but so long that it's here, I want to surrender to its goodness.

My face, digestive system and my bowels are not having it lately. I'm worried about Thanksgiving and Christmas season coming soon! :( ...American and Vietnamese food combined, and loads of it at that!

This is Annie, crying signing off.

End of the quarter and saturday morning shopping

Well, guys, I made it a fourth of the way through my last year of high school. It went by really quickly and I feel absolutely great about myself and my GPA. (I haven't felt this way at all throughout junior year, so this is a nice change.)
Already in two months I've had some major changes in post-secondary education plans but I feel I'm going to stick to these changes. No, I'm not going to audition to enter any music minor programs because with all the classes I will have to take in my first two years of college in order to transition to Pharmacy School, I won't have time. I can always study with a private teacher alongside studying on my own terms, too, so it's all fine. My friends certainly were expecting me to audition into Music School, but it's not the life for me right now. I do want to enroll in Music School ten years down the road, though. We'll see!

Yesterday was our last day to see the orchestra sub--the handsome one--and strangely it wasn't a bittersweet farewell at all. There were times when he hated working with us and we hated working with him, but we laughed it off yesterday and put it aside to talk about Drake and Degrassi.

<insidejoke>We just want to make music.</insidejoke>

He wrote me a simple and sweet letter of recommendation for the school's Music Honors Society and now we're all Facebook friends, so there's really no bad side to his leave. :)

This morning after Mass my mom took me out to "Asiandale" to shop for BB CREAMS, of all things. I've known about them for a while and have coveted one for so long, but never brought them up because I thought my mom would think I'm materialistic. She found out from friends at work when she brought up her concern for my skin problems and looked up Missha BB Creams on her free time - I'm so touched that she cares about my skin more than I do sometimes! :')
Getting there was no problem. Getting out was, though, because we're women. Walking into a cosmetics store alone is enough to cast this spell of "Let me just sample everything and never return home", plus, the packaging for each product makes you think they're jewels!

Basically, what we ended up bringing home was this:

It looks like a month's worth of free samples.

And what my mom planned to get was this:

Right: Missha Signature Real Complete BB Cream

I'm wearing the BB Cream sampled in the store right now, and for its fourth hour, it still looks flawless. I'll post some photos and do a review on it sooon.

Four-day weekend in the school county means I get to do nothing and hang out with friends care-free. Happy four-day weekend!